7th December 2024, NewsOrient, Books, Arts, Culture, News, Lifestyle
By Dapo Thomas

“Who is the Department” instructed that I should not proceed to chapter two until he had approved chapter one, indicating chapter by chapter approval.

Three weeks after he gave me the approval to commence work, I submitted my chapter one. He told me to come back a week later. I had always thought my English was impeccable until my supervisor returned my script. He took me to the cleaners with his comments, corrections and professorial assaults.

He defaced my work with his red pen in a manner that suggested I wrote “rubbish and nonsense”. Every line attracted a comment. Every sentence was punctured with errors. Every paragraph was adjudged incoherent. Every page suffered mutilation. The whole chapter was butchered into pieces and returned to me for a re-write. I was completely dazed and demoralized. We had entered a new phase in our relationship- let’s call it “HIS 102: How to write History in English.”

I am assuming that I wrote the first one in vernacular. I couldn’t show anybody my script including my close friends. I was ashamed of myself. I suffered literary dishonour and language injury in the hands of “The Department”.

I bore my shame without peer review. For almost one week, I was going about like a stutter, picking my words like a kindergarten and trying to skip long debates in English, in class and at forums, to avoid Montessori insolence after professorial impudence. It is not every time one can tolerate miscellaneous insults.

I withdrew into a shell by enslaving myself in the colony of psychology. What shocked me most was that there was not a single page out of the 10 pages of my manuscript that passed the scrutiny of “The Department”. I wanted to go and tell Dr Biodun Adediran, my mentor, about this “collosal linguistic outrage” but I knew that as usual, he would just be laughing at me. I didn’t need that. I needed constructive succour and progressive palliative, or at best, spiritual motivation.

Unfortunately, at a critical time like this, my Celestial Patroness may refuse to intervene. She doesn’t like to interfere in matters relating to knowledge resources because she believes I do not lack an ounce of them. Personally, as a matter of policy, I love solving my problems myself for as long as they are within the realm of human possibilities.

Anyone with natural endowment to unravel puzzles but still seeks regular interventions from the Celestial or the Spiritual is likely to recline into dysfunction for reducing talent to secondary agent.

After intense ruminations that took several days, I came up with a strategy that would consume less energy if followed diligently. I invented a strategy called “language packaging and arrows”. The logic was that If Akinjogbin was the one condemning your English, then get hold of his books and study his English and return it to him in your own words but in his own style.

That was what I did. I went for only two of his work that are my favorites: “The Ebi Concept Reconsidered”, one of the seminar papers he presented at the History department in 1978/79, and his inaugural lecture titled “History and Nation Building” which he delivered on November 28, 1977. Those two were enough for me to study. I read and read and read. The second part of the strategy was to study my own errors as identified by “The Department” in my manuscript. I went through all his comments, and they were legion. Here are some excerpts: “This is too bombastic”. “Unnecessary tautology “. ” You are not writing literature. Your descriptions are good for literature not History”. “This expression is Cobra-ish”. ” Your analysis is vague”. “In History, facts are sacred than descriptions. State the facts and do less description.” “This is too journalistic.” ” This is too flowery”. “Concentrate on details of events not description of events”. “You talk too much for your facts, let your facts speak for themselves”. “This is not the language of History “. “You have overshadowed your facts with too much embellishments”. “Please, re-write and represent “.

I read and re-read the comments. Then, I began to study the comments as well. I was critical of myself. I was clinical in my thoughts and I was able to discover the sources of the errors. By the time I finished reading and studying his two books; by the time I worked on my errors, I had enough language arrows to send to “The Department”. I got his style, structure, construction, usage, vocabs, tense application, expression and linguistic simplicity. In short, I developed what I would call “Akinjogbin: Multidisciplinary language techniques and usage” by inventing English language for History Students” “English language for journalists” “English language for English students ” and “English language for Literature students”.

In the next manuscript (about 11 pages), I sent to him, I used only English language for History Students. Being supervised by a Professor like Akinjogbin was indeed a privilege.

But as the first Professor of History in Unife (he became a Professor in 1968), I needed to walk hand in hand with a high voltage of “electrical intuition” to be able to blast every barrier erected by “The Department”.

This time, I must get it right. I didn’t have time for any “slow and steady wins the race experiment”. The department of History had given a June deadline for project submission. So, this was a “war” you had to fight with the whole of your body including your mental endowments.

No doubt, I got the man this time around. Convinced that these new “arrows” I had fashioned against him (which were developed from his own manuals) would prosper, I re-wrote my chapter one and sent to him.

The next time I would hear from him, it was good news with a mild drama in his office. Two weeks after I submitted the manuscript, he saw me at the corridor of the History department and said “Thomas, tele mi (Thomas, follow me)” – the same way JESUS told Peter to follow him. The only difference was that I was not a fisherman. I was a student.

On getting to his office, he brought out my manuscript and gave it to me. I opened it from page 1 to page 6 before I saw read marks. I opened further to page 11, I didn’t see any comments. I looked up and smiled because my “linguistic arrows” had prospered. He didn’t know why I smiled.

He now spoke in Yoruba again: ” Iwo na o ri pe eleyi better ( Can’t you see that this is better?)”. I said yes Sir. “Thank you Sir” and I quickly invested another obeisance by prostrating for him not only because he was “The Department” but because he was also “The Language ” after all, it was his language I rebranded for him and he didn’t know. I was about leaving his office when he called me back. “Did you see the sentence I underlined in the paper?” I nodded. He said I should read it out. I read: “The conflagration that enveloped Egbaland in 1948 was a consequential paroxysm of Oba Ladapo Ademola’s unappetizing economic policies which fatally ended in harakiri.” After I finished reading, he asked: ” What does that mean”. I said: “The harsh economic policies of Oba Ladapo Ademola were responsible for the 1948 crisis in Egbaland.” He gave me a pen and said, “Write it like that in your paper and remove that harakiri.” To be honest, it was a deliberate insertion to confirm if he was truly averse to highfalutin words. His reaction confirmed it and I never did that again in subsequent chapters.

Following my promise to “The Department” that I would be relinquishing my Cobra Chief position very soon, I was working on my last edition of the magazine as Cobra Chief on Tuesday, April 23, 1985, around 9pm, at our operational base beside the General office of the PG School, when one of us, Ogedengbe David, the Political and Features Editor ran down to the PG School to inform us that Tunde Idiagbon, the Chief of Staff, Supreme headquarters had listed us as one of the three subversive bodies circulating propaganda materials against the federal government.

I first thought it was a huge joke because the only article “Cobra” wrote against the government since its intrusion into power was “Dancing The Kokoma Music” . The article, which was the magazine’s editorial, was written as an appendix to the various cacophonous voices of opposition against some of the harsh economic policies of the government.

Agreed that military governments were fond of exaggerating offensive publications and their contents, must Buhari and Idiagbon stoop so low as to attach national significance, or any significance at all, to an innocuous campus journal that mocked and bugged students who indulged in concupiscence and political malfeasance within the academic community? What a shame!

Some of the members suggested that we should suspend our production until further notice. I told them on the spot that that would never happen. I had no familiarity with timidity. I told them that we would pretend as if we didn’t hear the News even though it was aired on the NTA NETWORK News at 9. I could see some of them shaking and wondering what kind of fellow I was.

Normally, we sold the magazine anytime from 1am in all the halls. That night, I made sure that all the vendors (members of the Agency) that would sell the magazine were on standby.

The decision was to move to the various halls from our production base in PG School and start selling the magazine regardless of what time it was.

Unfortunately, I had to go to my room to retrieve some materials that we needed to add to the magazine in view of this latest development. By the time I got to the room, Kunle Ajibade had received hundreds of messages on my behalf. The Director of Students Affairs, Mr David Oyeyemi had dropped a message for me to see him in his office the following day. Our two advisers, Dr Wole Ogundele, (Kunle Ajibade’s lecturer) and Mr Kemi Rotimi, (my tutorial lecturer ) had also left me some messages. The three of them knew that we were to sell the magazine that midnight having displayed our highlights in the morning. Highlights were the captions of the stories that were contained in the magazine.

More or less like an advert. They cautioned that I should suspend the sale of the magazine until further notice. By the time I returned to PG SCHOOL, two of our members that I put on standby had dropped their copies and went AWOL without any formal notice. They told Tunde Oyesiji, the Cobra Scribe, that I told to monitor them that they wanted to use the toilet. It was from there they vamoosed into a convenient outlet. Even those who waited betrayed their emotions as they jumped for joy when I told them we were suspending the sale of the magazine until further notice.

I suspected they were all afraid of the government of Buhari/ Idiagbon which had a pathetic record of historical wickedness.

The following morning, I went to see the DSA. He told me matter of factly to forget about selling any magazine under such prevailing circumstances. I argued with him that it was not possible to incur such a loss on the basis of fear. We had invested so much resources and energy in that particular edition that not selling it would mean a complete waste of time and scarce resources.

He threatened to ban the magazine if we did. I didn’t say anything because I had my plans.

Meanwhile, some of the girls that were “bugged” were happy with the development. Our staff advisers were divided on the issue. One was indifferent to our decision to go ahead with the sale, one was categorical that we should not sell so as not to aggravate the tension. Some Students Union members who never loved Cobra were also happy that we were being harassed left, right and centre.

The only person that was not harassing us was the Vice Chancellor, Prof.Wande Abimbola. He stood by us all through the intimidation. He was calm throughout the episode. He advised that we should wait until the storm had abated before releasing or selling the magazine to the public.

He told us that if there was no official directive from the government on the matter, in the next one week, we should continue with our activities. He further advised us to remove any article that was against the government in the magazine so as not be seen to be playing to the gallery.

I assured him there was nothing about the government in that particular edition. Our contact, Rótìmí Esho, a former Students Union President, pleaded with me to follow the VC’s advice. We were still discussing with the VC when the “New Nigerian”, a federal government newspaper, published a screamingly sensational headline in its Sunday edition, April 28, 1985: “UNIFE IS HOME OF ‘KING COBRA’.”

In the strange front page report, which carried no byline, the paper wrote: “King Cobra” , one of the organizations which the Chief of Staff, Supreme headquarters, Major General Tunde Idiagbon recently identified as trying to subvert the Federal Military Government is based in the University of Ife in ile-Ife.” The report continued: “Contrary to expectations, it was discovered that the alleged subversive organization is not a clandestine body. It is registered with the University authorities and publishes an internal journal named “The King Cobra”, published by Cobra News Agency of the University of Ife.

It stated further: “The journal has an editorial board consisting of nine members led by one Mr Dapo Thomas (Alias Mujemu) who styles himself the ‘Cobra Chief’.

Our investigation revealed that the address of the Cobra Chief is No. 299, Fajuyi Hall while that of the Scribe is 272, Fajuyi Hall -both in UNIFE Campus.”

As far as I was concerned, the Sunday New Nigerian report was a mischievous and spicy packaging to reinforce government’s spurious allegations against Cobra. It was strange that the lead story in a so-called national newspaper carried no byline. Stranger still, was the fact that having located my hall and my room number, the investigator (not reporter) failed to interview me for my own side of the story. I think it was this lacuna that the Sunday Concord wanted to fill that made it send its reporter, Bolaji Macaulay, to come and interview me for our own side of the story.

In the interview published in the Sunday Concord of May 5, 1985, I lambasted the New Nigerian management for being so unprofessional in the way it handled such a sensitive national issue. In its own report, the Sunday Concord wrote: “The King Cobra is a monthly satirical Campus magazine edited by Dapo Thomas, a part four History student known within “Cobra” circles as “Cobra Chief”.

Thomas admitted that once in a while, the magazine writes editorials on government policies and activities but definitely nothing near what the government has alleged.”

Of course, there were threats to my life and there were fears in the University Community that I could be kidnapped but I was unshaken and unruffled as I went about my academic activities preparing for my final exams in the University. I also had a June deadline for the submission of my project.

(TO BE CONTINUED)

Dr Dapo Thomas’ From Primary To Tertiary, Here Is My Diary Is Serialised Here Weekly, Every Saturday

~ NewsOrient

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